Rude Awakening

Me: *peacefully drifting in and out of early morning sleep.*

Husband: "Hey."

Me: *eyes flutter open*

Husband: "Hey, you awake?"

Me: "Huh, wha?"

Husband: "The dog threw up on the carpet (light beige), I cleaned it up but there's a big stain (dark brown), you wanna take care of that?"

AAaaannnnnnd cue the start of my day.

Slacker?

I'm not going to delve into any deep religious issues here but I wanted to take a moment to point out the bumper sticker I saw today:

So am I to understand that it's important to 'LOOK BUSY' ie. give the appearance like you've BEEN doing the Lord's work, when in reality you've spent the better part of your life as a slack-ass... But NOW... Oh hey, looky there... Jesus just pulled up and he's gettin' ready to walk in the office and BOY is he going to be pissed when he finds you with your feet up on the desk, texting your BFF and taking extended coffee breaks, even though that 'Sacred Blessings' account is due tomorrow.

Here's an idea! How 'bout you do the job you're supposed to do, whether or not some all powerful entity is looking over your shoulder?

This Sure As Hell Ain't New York City or Milan Dahling

Woman spotted in town today wearing:

1. A Mullet hair-style pulled into a ponytail.
2. Oversize cut-off shorts.
3. Spongebob t-shirt.

Now that's class... Mid-Atlantic style.